Let Angels Lead You In

Dear Friends

I'm not quite sure what to say and so have avoided this post for a few days. Let me start with the easy stuff... my health is slowly but surely improving. The Doctors are encouraged by all of my tests and feel confident that I will make a full recovery soon. I am feeling better and better each day, just a bit tired. Who knew a shower could be completely exhausting? The great news is I have lost about 60 pounds in 3 weeks! Yeah. I don't suggest my methods, kidney dialysis, plasma replacement, overall loss of appetite from being immobile in a hospital bed, however very effective. Most of the weight was toxic fluid from my kidneys failing to function. I still have some baby weight to lose, but most of the work has been done for me.

On that note, it took a few days for us all to realize how sick I really was and what the outcome could be. Googling HELLP syndrome afterwards was a semi traumatic experience for me. I met every criteria for "rarely happens, but possible." I am alive today because of the faithful prayers and fasting of so many, the amazing skill and care of the Doctors, and without question due to the vigilance and tenderness of the nurses at Baystate hospital. Our thanks is eternal and we hope for opportunities to repay our debt to each of you.

Now onto the stuff that makes you go hmmm... I think it was the book Tuesdays with Morrie that encouraged the idea of having a living funeral so you could know how much you mean to other people. I believe Travis and I were given that unique opportunity by Hazel. As I reflect on all of the many ways we have been shown love and sympathy over the past couple of weeks I am completely overwhelmed and humbled. I don't have words, and I don't think I ever will, to describe the depth of our gratitude. I cannot tell you what it felt like to see so many of you at Hazel's memorial service. It brought us such comfort and real joy. I'm also grateful that Hazel has allowed us to reconnect with friends and family. What a blessing she is.

And now the hard stuff... we are continually being asked how we are (which by the way is completely fine) and the honest answer is some moments are great and others we are broken hearted. We still do a fair amount of crying ourselves to sleep at night and are struck at random moments with waves of grief, but we are comforted to know families can be together forever. Our sweet Hazel is engaged in a greater work for now, but someday we will all be together again. Hopefully she's preparing her brothers and sisters for this life and talking us up a bit. Travis and I are taking care of each other the best we can (he's actually a great nurse) and are grateful for the uniting power of trials.

I once heard someone say, "Don't be sad it's over, be glad you were able to go through it." That's kind of how we think of this experience. We are the blessed one's. As always, thank you for your continued prayers on our behalf. We love you!