The Art of Living (Inspired by Alycia Bryll)

Dear Friends

I'm sorry about the 4 month hiatus. I have been loosely committed to this blog from the beginning, but I was really having difficulty finding something to talk about. The other day I was catching up with a good friend, Alycia Bryll, and she completely inspired me.

She was one of my swimmers a few years ago. When I saw her the other day, it struck me that she was now an adult. She has transformed into this different person- maybe because of age, possibly because of what she is learning in college, or more likely because of how her experiences are shaping her into someone else.

I have been doing a lot of reflecting on my life also. In July of 2009 I was this person. I was so thrilled with my life in the sense that things were going well. I had a loving husband, great job, and was working towards my Masters. I didn't have everything that I wanted, but I surely had enough.

I was happy. We were happy.

And then a month later we found out we were pregnant and this whole journey of transformation began. It was scary and painful, long and drawn out, and completely unavoidable. I handled it by withdrawing from the world. Not standing still necessarily, but standing back.

Terrified to move forward. Essentially scared to live.

And here we are now. 2011. There was this sense of excitement that accompanied the New Year. Maybe it was more relief, but it just felt hopeful for the first time in months (maybe years.) This year I am dedicated to LIVING. Not just moving through the motions or counting down the days, but truly living. Allowing myself to breathe, feel, fear, try, be. I look forward to sharing it with you and wish you all a wonderful New Year.